Jehovah’s Witnesses

A few weeks ago, I made friends with some locals that tapped on my door. To cut a long story short, after telling them too much personal information thinking they were friendly neighbours, they announced they were Jehovah’s Witnesses - doh!

Yeah, we get them over here too! They turn up in pairs and only one does the talking. After they got the foot in the door they came back and I let my wife handle them. Unfortunately she reads alot of books and has read the bible and even the Kuran so they had lot’s to discuss on the doorstep. She is too nice to tell them to get lost.

Finally they left but came again when only I was home. I explained that my wife was not interested but they didn’t understand why since she seemed interested. They handed me a Watch tower magazine and left. I skimmed the mag to check out what they are about and it seems that the end of the world as we know it is very close. Soon all suffering will end and the good people will live in paradise will all the good people that died before being brought back to life.

Well I think I am a good enough person to escape being killed on judgement day. So I don’t plan on getting bible brainwashing lessons at home from them and giving up many of the sins I enjoy like booze and flirting etc.

Anyway, they came back again and got deep into discussion of the evolution of man from Adam and Eve with my wife who was asking how come different races are so different even though they came from the same people and engaged in incest etc. I later suggested to her that it’s only in recent times that the earth became a globe with a large separation between continents. In the flat earth days it would have been much easier to spread the family members around the world.

I guess the most likely time the earth became a globe was at the time Noah loaded up the Arc? The official recognition that the Earth was round of course came many years later with Galileo.

Anyway it turns out that  Jehovah’s Witnesses are brainwashed by their preachers and they simply quote bible passages as answers to everything. They didn’t seem to be able to debate the questions my wife was throwing at them but simply picked out stock phrases from the bible and kept dodging the issues. The other person who stays quite is like a student who can’t open the mouth until they have learn’t enough stock answers to the most common questions. Like a FAQ.

When I was studying at University, my housemate was a Religious Studies student. He didn’t seem to be at all religious (interested in the gay side of the clergy) but had an in-depth knowledge of the bible. He used to say how he had fun with Jehovah’s Witnesses on the door step. Like they would answer a question with a stock biblical quote but he would come back with a counter argument backed by a biblical quote to total flummux them!